Friday, February 21, 2014

A Skunk, a Kitchen and the Roosters


How are skunks, a kitchen, and roosters connected? Well, let me explain…

It all started out like a normal evening, crawling in bed around 10:30 and falling in a deep sleep from the busyness of the day. All to be awakened at 12:30 in the morning by the most ghastly choking smell of a skunk. I think my face turned red and horns came out of my head as I swore to kill the skunk with my bare hands, or a pitchfork, or make Seth shoot it. I was convinced it had got in the basement again, the smell was so strong. We lit some candles and sprinkled essential oils on the bed (Ylang Ylang, what was I thinking?) It just smelled like stinky skunk perfume in our room. After 10 minutes of failed sleep I went to the couch, but the smell wasn’t much better there either. So, we moved the mattress into the kitchen at 1am. It was cooler in the kitchen so we grabbed another blanket, so far it wasn’t too bad, we at least could breath. We got about an hour or so of sleep after almost crying, and hysterically laughing about the whole thing. Seth said he needed to smell something good like peanut butter, and I suggested he give himself a peanut butter mustache so he could smell and lick some off when he so desired. We finally settled down, and then around 4am the crowing started. Our roosters crow all the time, the barn is just on the other side of the kitchen, yeah, so we moved the bed back to the bedroom at 4:30am. The skunk smell had dissipated by that point and the candles were still going. I cracked the window just to keep some fresh air coming in. We awoke around 8am feeling exhausted and bewildered by the whole thing. For some unknown reason we have a local skunk who likes to spray just outside our bedroom every few months. Someday if you come up to me and I smell like a skunk, it’s because I killed it with my bare hands. Here’s to a good night sleep for everyone tonight!